Sunday 25 October 2015

Lately

Its hard you know i just don't show it.I feel like a useless piece of trash because its like i don't matter at all.I get tired and frustrated and at the end i come running back when i'm needed. Isn't this enough to show the extent of how i feel?   

Friday 22 May 2015

Update

Maybe this is just a hallow greeting through the internet but hello.Nothing much has been going on just normal college life things have been slow.Just what a normal lonely young adolesent male homosapian would go through.Exams are near and i've been studying kinda hard got to raise my cgpa back to 3.0 as i've got dreams to go overseas.If i do get a chance it will be great.The experiance would probably help me grow mentally and my poetry might mature as well.Talking about that i've been collecting my poems to publish i have a few now but i'm not sure if its any good we'll see.Well a lot as changed since the last time i wrote.I've changed.Romance wise still no luck ( i just heard as sarcastic laugher echo in my head ).That's all for now till we meet again 

Sunday 19 April 2015

Broken

Its been this way forever.It feels like a journey that never ends constantly searching from that one thing.Imagine you look up its colorful yet its cloudy and that clouds are your insecurities and you look up with hope you see colors you love they come and go like the seasons.Its been a journey for me but I've yet to find it in my case its love its always been and will be.Which kind of love you may ask ? the answer is any that makes me feel i'm actually important and special for once.Remember the colorful world i was talking about when you look around you find this floating balls of light well those are the people important to you they float along you and illuminating you on the cloudy days.Well this journey has lead me into a lot of problems some might even remain forever.I'm broken inside i'll always want someone to love me and i get jealous when someone gets close to the ones i love by that i still mean all types of love.I wonder sometimes if i will ever have partial little genetic copies of me ? if i do i want to make sure i love them with all i have and show them. Cause I've never had that all I've had is things given to me to quench the absence of love and out of guiltiness.It might all come out as desperate but there a big hole inside.Sometimes i even get tired from all the walking in that colorful world its kind of weird i don't know how to say it.At the end i just want to be loved like everyone else.I feel weak at times cause when people are kind to me my heart waivers so much cause it has never experience it before and i get to get a little attached.I wish i could make this feeling go away but it wont.

Thursday 5 March 2015

Living Diamonds

What are living diamonds you may ask ? Well that's the word that best describes my 3 dear friends.Why do i call them that? well diamonds are precious stones that glow and sparkle and always attracts your attention.Thus the analogy of the diamond.The living part of course is because their living moving weird mammals.So how about me ? I think i am the miner who goes to the mine just to look at this diamonds in admiration and without them i'm the miner who losses his sense of purpose 

Thursday 6 November 2014

Question

Its 3.20 a.m and the question running through my head is should i make a bowl of instant noodles for myself ?